[first date voice] so tell me about your weather hobbies. fuck i mean, tell me the weather. no that’s not what i meant i was trying to say what are your hobbies. wonderful weather we’re hobbing. having. fuck
" HERA: who is thisDirtbag Zeus on thetoast.net (via laurencombeferre)
ZEUS: who is what
HERA: who is this naked youth
ZEUS: youre going to have to be more specific
HERA: the one at your feet
what about him
HERA: where did he come from
ZEUS: where did any of us come from
could be from the sea
or my own head
or spit up by an angry snake
hard to tell
HERA: did you kidnap him for sex
HERA: did he kidnap you for sex
my cup guy
this is Ganymede, Official Cup Holder
he holds the cups
ZEUS: youve been saying forever that we need a guy to hold all the cups we use
HERA: i’ve never said that
ZEUS: someones been saying it
i just thought id save us all a little trouble
HERA: why isn’t he holding any cups
HERA: if he’s the cup holder why doesn’t he have a cup to offer me
[ZEUS raises his hands and all of Mount Olympus begins to shake violently. HERA is trapped underneath a falling rock]
ZEUS: sorry babe
cant hear you over all this earthquake "
" Except you can’t show a topless woman on TV - and you can’t defibrillate a woman in a bra. So victims of heart attacks on TV are always male. Did you know that a woman having a heart attack is more likely to have back or jaw pain than chest or left arm pain? I didn’t - because I’ve never seen a woman having a heart attack. I’ve been trained in CPR and Advanced First Aid by the Red Cross over 15 times in my life, the videos and booklets always have a guy and say the same thing about clutching his chest and/or bicep.
And people laugh when I tell them women are still invisible in this world. "
Things I did not know, but should.
This is a post that might save a life.
My mom worked for 25 years as an ER nurse and is convinced that a lot of women die simply because folks only know heart attack symptoms that occur in males.
Society thinks our bodies are so scandalous that it’s better to put our lives at risk than to show us how to stay safe
A friend of mine was having a cardiac episode recently, and it began with jaw pain. I had never heard of this before, and god help us, she had to explain to me how cardiac events present in women WHILE HAVING ONE. (I didn’t disbelieve her, I just had idea what the jaw pain meant.)
She is fine now. But if your heart is failing, I suspect you have better things to do than explain to your slow but well-meaning friend the symptoms of a heart attack in women.(via thatassholewhat)